Well, well, well…look who’s stirring up trouble in the cookie jar! President Biden looks to be having a rough time wooing two distinct groups: the discontented blue puppets facing cookie shrinkage and the “uncommitted” anti-Israel voters.
It’s a sizeable issue, just like Biden’s shrinking approval ratings.
In the land of Minnesota, where a hefty Muslim-American voting bloc resides, Biden has only managed to snag 70.6% of the vote so far in the state’s Super Tuesday’s presidential primary, while the “uncommitted” crowd (aka anti-Israel voters) proudly claimed 18.9%.
North Carolina isn’t much of a Biden fan either, with “uncommitted” grabbing 12.7% of the vote. Axios has done the math elsewhere – spoiler alert: it’s not adding up in Biden’s favor.
Many Democrat voters are ditching President Dementia.
And hey, it’s not just these folks giving Biden side-eye. His base, in other cities and states, seems to be disgruntled about many different issues including stance on Israel, the economy, the border crisis, his age and his senility. Because of this, Dems are threatening to ghost him. Losing Black voters and the youth as well, he seems to be hemorrhaging support faster than his 100+ birthday candles would lose wax on a hot summer day.
It’s not that the Dems will run into the arms of Orange Man Bad; no. But they might just Netflix and chill on Election Day or throw their vote at a third-party candidate like RFK Jr.
Cookie Monster not happy with the results of Biden policies.
But wait, there’s more! Turns out, Biden’s got another problem in his puppet-filled court – none other than the Cookie Monster from Sesame Street.
On March 4th, this lovable creature took to his X social media account, flexing his grammatically incorrect prowess, and told his approximately 626,000 fans, “Me hate shrinkflation! Me cookies are getting smaller.” You can check out the intellectual discourse here:
Me hate shrinkflation! Me cookies are getting smaller. 😔
— Cookie Monster (@MeCookieMonster) March 4, 2024
Shrinkflation is bad, resulting in smaller cookies and less toilet paper.
Shrinkflation, according to the wizards at Merriam-Webster, is the art of reducing a product’s size while pretending the price is a constant. But under Biden’s reign, oh no, it’s not just the size that’s shrinking – it’s our wallets too. We’re paying more for less, and it’s not a gourmet deal.
The Biden administration forgot the letter “D” for denial.
But fear not, for the Biden administration, the maestro of blame-shifting, is here to save the day. In response to Cookie Monster’s lament, they issued a statement: “C is for consumers getting ripped off. President Biden is calling on companies to put a stop to shrinkflation.”
Bravo, Biden, for pointing fingers faster than a kid caught with their hand in the cookie jar.
Apparently, it’s not Biden’s economic wizardry or the fossil fuel feud causing inflation. No, it’s the mysterious forces of the universe, blaming everyone from big companies to Trump to Covid.
Because in the world of Democrats, holding oneself accountable is as uncommon as finding a chocolate chip in an oatmeal raisin cookie.
Biden not popular in American Samoa either.
President Dementia is projected to lose the Democratic caucus in American Samoa according to Just the News. He’ll be losing to businessman Jason Palmer who currently has about 56% of the vote and who says the President of the United States should be “younger.”
In addition to wanting to have more cookies in our cookie packages, that’s certainly something that just about everyone can agree on.
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