I was chatting with a friend of about 50 years, we met somewhere around the time I was in the 6th grade, when she told me of an incident at our home airport in Hollywood-Ft. Lauderdale, Florida.

She is a nurse with a very good education and decades of experience. She was minding her own business waiting for a flight. As there was no mask requirement at the departure gate, she was not wearing one.

A woman in a mask and her husband sat close to her and the wife begins passive aggressive complaining about those who don’t wear masks. Her kvetching gets louder. My pal ignores her. Others join them at the gate, they are also maskless. Finally, the woman gets up, exasperated, and bellows to her no doubt long suffering husband that they must move because of the incipient infection about to overtake them.

I had a similar experience recently at my grocery store. I was shopping, the store has not required masking for quite a while, just going about my chores. Suddenly a small man in a large mask steps right in front of me and says, “How could you?”

I wasn’t sure what he meant at first, but then he angrily pointed at my face. I retorted, “How could I (expletive) your mother? Trust me, it was quite easy.” He left.

The reason I bring these incidents to your attention is to point out a new feature of modern convenience. You don’t have to guess anymore as to someone’s political affiliation. Especially after Judge Mizelle’s brave ruling, if they’re wearing a mask, they’re a Democrat. They have marked themselves for instant identification.

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Now I know what you’re saying. But they already did. The 60s era hippie/today’s Birkenstock Bolshevik certainly have a certain unwashed and dim look that immediately classifies them as a Democrat. Same goes for new agey dressed woman, fey looking soy boys, the overly tattooed, and women in crew cuts.

However, there was always a chance you could get it wrong. The new agey chick could be a wealthy socialite going through a phase, but country club GOP through and through. The tattooed guy could be a USMC vet and thus not a likely Democrat. The soy boy and crew cut girl? Well, yeah.

Yes, masked Democrats have taken the guess work out of the equation. If they are masked at the beach, masked while driving alone, or masked while seated at a bar or restaurant then it is probable, local law notwithstanding, that they belong to the party of nonsensical rules and busybody adherents: The Democrats. Proper, unmasked, and deservedly elite Republicans are also thinking of marking ourselves. But Brooks Brothers doesn’t have enough in inventory to handle the potential demand.