There are times when one must wonder, is all Hollywood crass and cretinous?

Surely there must be some, even amongst the Tinseltown younger set, who have at least half a mind and the maturity of an eight year old. Like Diogenes we search, but usually, as in the case we’ll review, come up empty handed. These fruitless hunts are the occasions we are allowed to see one airheaded microcosm sum up almost an entire industry, said industry filled with spiteful rude toddlers who can’t utter a sentence without wallowing in their own special little gutter.

It is such with the untelegenic and swollen-visaged Chrissy Teigen. She had this to say on Tuesday about the First Lady, her husband and the virus, “Has melania (sic) even thought about doing something with her be best s— during these times? I see regular a– awesome people on my timeline all day doing all they can to make people happy and this wifebot is working on whatever the f— a tennis gazebo is.”

I expect Donald to be a do nothing fucking loser wimp but she could maybe possibly try to uhhh BE BETTER possibly the best be the best the best be best.

— chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) March 18, 2020

Ah, the classic eloquence, the maturity, the command of the language. This is what a pop culture icon looks like today. More now from the erudite Miss Teigen, “I expect Donald to be a do nothing f—ing loser wimp but she could maybe possibly try to uhhh BE BETTER possibly the best be the best the best be best. ALL I have seen this bot do is gently touch Christmas ornaments in a cape and stare in a cape and pat statues in a different cape and then change her cape into a rude ass jacket. F— you.”

By the way, she is married to another towering example of grace and gentility, the inaccurately-named musician John Legend.

You can see them sitting around their parvenu manse now, gaudy tchotchkes galore on every surface, hangers on near devoted to their every low brow wish, no matter how declasse.

Then one of this duo looks up from their intellectual stupor and stutters out, “I gonna talk sumthin’ bout Trump an’ sh**.” The other, brainless skull barely in movement, adjusts their drool bucket and nods their assent. And so we have the brilliance in the above statement.

Lucky us, to be alive in the age of genius such as that!

This piece was written by David Kamioner on March 18, 2020. It originally appeared in LifeZette and is used by permission.

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