I was amused over the weekend when an old friend of mine began making fun of all the goofy names people are coming up with for beer, now keep in mind she works in the industry for one of the big boys but her comments were spot on. “What the hell am I supposed to do with ‘Arrogant Bastard Ale, Blind Pig IPA, Polygamy Porter or Sexual Chocolate Imperial Stout?’” she mocked with complete exasperation. She keenly observed that these little micro breweries seem to spend more time trying to find some cute, catchy name rather than focusing on actually making beer. She clearly has had enough of that non-sense. “Shut up and make the damn beer!” She exclaimed. It rolled right off her tongue without skipping a beat. She nailed it. We all had a good laugh but she had made an excellent point. She had hit the ball hard and I realized that her observation extended far beyond “Old Leg Humper Porter or Pearl Necklace Oyster Stout.”
I have been giving that some thought today and have decided that same blunt force trauma could be used in a lot more places these days. I mean a lot of folks need to stop talking and start working. Stop bloviating about things we don’t want to hear about and focus on the things we all pay you to do. Really.
Let’s begin with those gifted with beautiful voices and stage presence who are overwhelmed with the need to pontificate about their political beliefs. Hey, shut up and sing!
To the world class athletes that were blessed by God, yes I said it, blessed by God with incredible physical gifts that allow them to keep their heads in the clouds while breathing rarified air; just shut up and dribble, pass, run, hit, kick, catch, shoot and score. I want you to do that a lot if you are on “my team” but I still do not give a shhh about anything you have to say about life or family or politics. In fact I am quite sure I don’t really want to hear you talk at all. Like I said shut up and score or even better, shut up and score a lot! That’s what I am really interested in.
Lets not forget those that play make-believe for unbelievable lottery-like paychecks in Hollywood and New York while looking down their noses at those of us who actually buy the tickets to watch their fantasy world; shut up and act! You can talk to me on screen but not to tell me about how you know best for the world. What, you learned you were the smartest person in the world pretending to be smart in some movie? Give me a break.
I am sick and tired of the drivel being poured on the world by those making a fortune from the rest of us while complaining about just about everything. Francis McDormand won an Oscar over the weekend I’m told and she also took time to make it a political moment. I am not really what she was pointing out getting people like Meryl Streep to stand up for women apparently not treated right. I mean really? Hey, shut up, I’ve got a few billboards that are coming to mind when I hear that kind of disingenuous garbage.
Her Oscar was stolen during an after party for a time if you didn’t hear. The guy was cuffed and dragged and is in jail in lieu of $20,000 bond. Now if ole Franny was really worried about the poor and down trodden maybe she would let this poor schmuck keep that damn statue. After all it’s clear he likely needs the cash more than she does. No, wait it was a dude so he clearly deserves nothing.
Francis McDormand is worth tens of millions of dollars and that doesn’t even take into account her husband Joel Coens cash. I am sorry if I find it difficult to take these folks too seriously during these interludes into real life. They are often short and unsubstantial before they return to a world of fairy dust and make-believe.
Until then, please just shut up and entertain me. You have been very well paid to do exactly that and nothing else.